New Crush Faces Age-Old Problem ... A Jerk

Dear Dee:
OK. So lately I've started to form a crush. He's super cute and he's so sweet to me when it's just me and him alone.

However when he's around his friends he acts kind of mean. I'm guessing he's just trying to show off. I really really like him and I want a relationship. I don't know if he's allowed to date or anything though. How do I find out if he likes me? I just want to communicate how I feel to him but I don't know how.

Don't you ever ... ever ... ever make excuses for a guy not treating you right. Who cares how he treats you in private, if when he gets around others, he is mean, ashamed or a complete ass to you. A REAL nice guy knows how to treat a lady right in public and in private.

I can't reiterate this to you enough ... Don't let this get out of hand and don't start putting up with it now. You're young. And right now, you are establishing patterns for the rest of your life. If you put up with this kind of behavior from a punk now, you always will. And that's not the kind of person you want to become. See things for what they are, honey. He's a jerk -- OR just not old enough to know how a guy should treat a girl.

So, what do you do now? Do you tell him how you feel? Absolutely not. Do not let him have that kind of control over you. He obviously already knows you like him and he thinks he can get away with this type of split-personality behavior. Show him he can't.

Ignore him. Only speak to him when he speaks to you. And don't give any more than you have to. In fact, the best thing to do would probably be to move on and find someone else worthy of your affections! Maybe he'll shape up. Who knows -- maybe by playing it cool, you'll show him what he's missing out on and he'll wake up. You can't ever tell. But either way, be on your guard.

Hey, sorry if this isn't what you want to hear but it is very important to me to make sure you know you are worth more than being kind to only part of the time. You are worth being sweet to at all times. And, you deserve to be treated right 24/7.

A real guy -- mature enough to handle any type of friendship or relationship with a girl -- knows this. Unfortunately, too many guys in this world haven't gotten the memo. And girls like us? Well, we have to watch out for them and make sure they know we've got that memo memorized ... down to the letter.