Moving On Is Easier Said than Done

Dear Dee:
I'm the same girl who wrote the "He's Not Ready for a Relationship" post.

I just wanted to say thank you so much for your advice! It really helped me out... Well, me and this guy are still friends, but it just doesn't seem like it was before. We'd say smile and say hi to each other all the time, but I don't know! It's just weird...considering the fact that he said he still likes me. It's been so many weeks now, and I THINK I'm getting over him...Its taking time though because everything seems to remind me of him... Yeah, you're right about the whole "he should have told you he wasn't ready in the beginning" thing because he totally led me on!

When we started talking, he made it seem like he was going to ask me out or something, but now that he's broken the news to me, it had me thinking that I did or said something that made him change his mind.

I know I should be moving on and getting over him, but it's really difficult because I loved him a lot ... I still do ... and I don't think my feelings have faded away just yet.

Listen, don't over-analyze this situation. It won't change it. All it will do is make you feel bad and doubt yourself. And you don't need that! Try really hard to think of other things when your mind starts wondering to the 'what ifs' and 'what happened' questions. What happened is, this guy is a weenie and it took him breaking your heart to find it out. And while that really sucks, it happens sometimes.

Just pick yourself up and realize that it's this guy's loss. And while it is hard to get over someone, you will ... and you will find someone else. If you need to stay away from him for awhile in order to heal, do it. And don't apologize for it! You've got to do what you have to do to help yourself move on. You are worth far better than him and you have a ton to offer a great guy ... don't lose heart.