Dated 3 Times, But Didn't Work Out

Dear Dee:
I have went out with this guy four times and it has never worked out. But we are still bff's and I can tell him anything. He is going out with one of my good friends now and I know he will NEVER like me in that way again -- even though I like him A LOT.

When I am around him I always end up acting stupid or weird. And sometimes I feel really happy when I am with him but also sometimes I feel sooo sad. I don't know what to do. I just know I can't stop thinking about him.

Hey, sometimes we just fall for the wrong guy. It's as simple as that. We try making a relationship work once, twice -- even three times, but it's just not the right time for that relationship to take off. It sucks, but it happens. That's not to say it will NEVER happen, but for right now, it doesn't seem like he's the guy for you.

So you're going to go through some painful times right now. It's gonna make you sad to see him with another girl, it's gonna hit you in the heart when he talks about other girls -- but if you're going to be his best friend, and you want to have at least that part of a relationship, you're going to have to deal with it.

I KNOW IT'S HARD! But maybe you could think about what really didn't work in your relationships. Why couldn't you guys make it happen? What went wrong and why couldn't you work it out? If you tried three times and still couldn't have a thriving relationship then something was/is consistently wrong. Keep that in mind when the feelings hit you. Try to realize that right now, you just work so much better as friends. And while you're heart may not like to hear it, right now you're mind will have to take over and bring your heart around to reason, understanding and finally acceptance.

If you need to, you might even consider stepping back for a few days from your friendship just to try to get a handle on your feelings. Maybe this will help you sort through it and figure out how to move on.

I wish you the best!