Dear Dee:
There's this boy I have a huge crush on. My friend said she didn't like him at all. He and I did go out before, but now we have broken up because of rumors.
Anyway, my friend likes him now and she's talking about how they should hook up. He and I just broke up! I still like him too, I told her that but she just can't seem to understand. What should I do?
ATTENTION ALL FRIENDS: DATING YOUR BEST FRIEND'S EX IS OFF LIMITS. IT'S UNCOOL, IT'S TACKY AND IT'S JUST MEAN -- ESPECIALLY IF YOUR FRIEND JUST BROKE UP WITH THE GUY A FEW DAYS BEFOREHAND.
OK. I feel much better now that I 'yelled' that out. Seriously. It's a rule -- and anyone who doesn't abide by it is not a true friend. Now, of course a friend can ask another friend 'permission' to date an ex, and if she's cool with that, then great. But as a general guideline, it's just not done!
You have to figure out how this really makes you feel. And if it really bothers you, you've gotta give it to her straight and don't spare any words. Tell her it hurts you to have her talking about dating him. And if she was your true friend, she'd wait until you got over him or she'd just move on. Really. Stand up to your friend on this. This could be a true test of whether she's a true friend.
Friends Don't Date Friend's Exes, Right?
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2 comments:
Okay, so I completely agree with Dee's "yelled" advice. When my boyfriend and I broke up, not even a week later one of my close friends asked him out. No consideration. Nothing. It hurt. I don't talk to her anymore because of it and she doesn't talk to me. If she would of asked, I would of warned her. I went out with him for two month and he got very pushy and when I refused to do anything he got violent. I hope what happened between them (they broke up) is not the same of what happened to me.
I also agree .I was going out with somebody and me and my friend talked to him all the time , i really liked him. well i soon found out that they had been talking behind my back ( which wasnt a big deal except they were flirting) and then i found out that while i was going out with him , she flirted and started dating him. i was so shocked and i felt really mad because not only did they go behind my back , they are still going out, and my friend talks to him in front of me or will talk about him in front of me. i just want to scream "its not fair of you to do this to me"
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