His Actions Make Her Say 'What the Heck?'

Dear Dee:
Two weeks ago my boyfriend of seven months broke up with me. We'd been going through a rocky patch and he decided we wanted different things from the relationship. He asked if we could still stay friends and I agreed.

I was very hurt by it, but I hid that from him as much as I could, and tried to still act like normal around him (though I avoided him a lot, just cause I figured bursting into tears might give me away). In any case, I'm now in a spot where I can deal with being around him and things being the way they were before(we were close friends for years before we dated). But now he's avoiding me. I don't see him in school much, and he has yet to say even 'hi' to me in the hallway or anything.

When I try to talk to him online, he always lets the conversation die (gets monosyllabic and never says anything other than responses to my comments) or he'll say he's gonna go play a video game. Sometimes I know he's lying about going to do other stuff too, cause he's still talking to other people.

So, what I want to know is, what the heck? He said he wanted to be friends, and now I'm trying and he's being all weird. So what should I do? Should I keep trying to talk to him, or just accept he lied about wanting to be friends, too?

This is SO classic guy. And to my male readers out there, I am sorry, but it's true (so maybe you can learn from this?). They break up with us, say they want to be friends, we finally adjust and then they give us the cold shoulder.

Basically, once they totally get what they want, they shut down on us and start avoiding us. Um, I HATE THAT! But, I have found a great way to turn the tables. Seriously, I have! ('Grey's Anatomy' fans, take a lesson from Lexi Grey and Mark Sloan ... I'll explain ... how Lexi kind of starts calling the shots, vs. Dr. Sloan in the season finale ...).

He broke up, so he calls the shots. He tries to make you adjust to being 'friends' ... again, he's controlling the situation. You finally adapt and he shuts you down. In all of these incidents, this guy has been in control. So now, you need to be in control.

For us girls, it takes a little practice sometimes. We might have to hide feelings. We have to try to fight back the tears when we're rejected. But it can be done. Don't show him how much he's hurting you. Don't avoid him. Suck it up, walk by him and show him you don't give a freak about what he's doing. Turn those tables. You are in control.

Self confidence is important in all areas of life, but it really lends itself to situations when we've been 'rejected.' So even if you have to fake it, keep your head held high, walk with purpose and let your attitude and determination do the talking for you.

'What the Heck?' Is totally right. I don't know why guys do it, but my gut tells me it's because sometimes us girls make it way too easy for them to step on us ... so armed with this knowledge, let's stop them cold in their tracks, shall we?