Dear Dee:
I am a 17-year-old guy in high school with a couple questions. I know some girls who like me but I don't have any kind of feelings for them at all. My standards are higher than the girls who like me.
How do I get them to stop flirting or liking me? I was also wondering, how can I approach more of the girls I like who are on a higher level than the ones who like me?
My sister introduced me to one of her friends. I really want to be with her and she would be on my level, but this was all the way back in July. I don't know if she has a boyfriend at all and my sister told me this girl told her she needs a man like me. I have her number and I always think about her. I want to text her but I don't know what she'll think about me and like I said before, I don't know if she found a boyfriend since July until now. So what should I do in this situation?
Please answer back please! I'm so confused and I need help about this stuff and I don't know who else to talk to.
I don't want to go off topic here, but there's something I have to say ... your comment, saying most girls aren't up to your level, and you want them to just leave you alone is well, in as few words as possible stuck up and really rude.
I can understand you saying this about a few subsets of girls i.e., some who are a little trashy or something, but your email reads as if you actually think you're too good for 90 percent of the female population ... this kind of bugs me. I really hope I have misinterpreted you here and you seriously don't look at other people as critically as it seems.
OK. I feel better now. Moving on ...
If these girls are bothering you with their flirting and attention, just let them down gently. If they're forthcoming enough to blurt out they want to date you, decline and say you're not available. If it's just senseless flirting, acknowledge it politely but don't participate. Girls don't like to continue to give attention when they're not really getting any in return. So it will stop.
Now, for this Supergirl you're interested in ...
The fact you have this girl's number, you've met her before and she willingly GAVE you her number means you can call her, text her or whatever. If she has a boyfriend, she'll tell you. It's just that simple. It's not like you're going to text her right off and say 'I want to be your boyfriend.' You're going to start a conversation, get something going and then ask when the time is right. If she tells you beforehand, GREAT!
So just get on the phone already -- and hopefully, when you actually meet her and get to know her, she won't fall off the pedestal you've put her on ... because, she's human after all.
High Standards or Just Plain Snobby?
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1 comment:
lol, you're a fool.
what you gotta do is...make yourself unpalatable to the girls that like you. Dont smile, dont talk much. look boring. In essence, dont give them any feedback. Do not stir up any emotions in them. They will get bored and move on.
As for your girl, just talk to her, and pretend like you do it all the time. Be as NATURAL as possible.
So Im posting this a little late for you...but if you ever come back and read this you can use this for future reference...
To get the girl you can play it two ways...
Call the girl. Tell her you're doing something this weekend and she can tag along if she wants.
BAM! You are now at the casual aquaintance stage with the potential for friendship or relationship. Now, when you get together with her face to face, communication will be much easier than on the fone. Now you two can hang out, you can talk freely get to know her a bit, whatever. Just have fun. Make her smile. Eventually, doesnt matter when, you should arrive at the topic of whether shes single or not. Do not say "do you have a boyfriend?" Instead say, "are you single?" if she tells you she has one, then say, "Well, I wont tell him if you dont." This is exciting to her, because it shows two things. One that you're confident and two that you're more focused on her than her BF issue. This will surely spark some emotion in her. Itll SHOW her you want her without telling her verbally "i want you" or "i like you."
Sometimes girls test you and say they have a BF. Saying this will negate that, and prove that you are still willing to go for her despite the hinderance of another male. This is confidence at its finest.
So basically the rest is common sense. If she says she has a BF and turns down your innocent comment, then you can be friends. If she says she has a BF but you can see that sparkle in her eye, and she hasnt turned you down, then invite her to hang out again.
If she doesnt have a BF, tell her you're doing something again on [insert day of the week here] and shes more than welcome to join you.
Okay the other way to play it...
leave strange text messages or short messages on her voicemail. Or if you talk to her, just talk to her for like a minute, then say you have to go. This will create interest. Anyway, build up enough interest in her, so that she starts texting you back or calling you. If this doesnt happen, she probably doesnt care cuz she has a BF. Or she might text back, but only with the intent for friendship.
eitherway, friend or girlfriend, you win.
and for the sake of other men, please dont ask a woman on how to attract women of a "higher level."
It makes everyone look stupid. I know what you were saying, but you shouldnt talk like that to the womenfolk. :P
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