Time To End 2-Year Relationship?

Dear Dee:
For the past couple of months I have been struggling with my feelings. I've been with this guy for two years and I love him. But for some reason there is this other guy lately who has been pulling me away.

I don't know how to handle the situation. Do I stay with the guy I've been with for two years and try to fight off the other feelings or do I try something new? I am so confused.


There isn't a relationship out there that's not vulnerable to being disrupted by one person wavering in their feelings. It just happens.

But in marriage or a truly committed relationship, where the two people know they're meant to be together, those feelings are worked through together and put into perspective. So in the end, the relationship the individuals are committed to survives and is stronger.

You're of course, not in this boat. While you've been with this guy for a while, it sounds like you're wavering on whether he's really the right one for you. And this is OK! That's what dating is for. And quite often, we enter into relationships for long periods of time then wake up to find it's not the right relationship for us.

What you've got to decide if what you have with your current boyfriend is worth fighting for or if your new feelings are merely a sign you and your boyfriend have grown apart and aren't 'right' for each other anymore. These are the questions you have to answer -- and answer honestly.

A two-year relationship is a tough one to end, but if it's really time to move on, do it. And I urge you to take some time before jumping into another relationship. Even though you decided to move on, there still might be some feelings you need to work through. And carrying that baggage into another situation isn't the smart thing to do.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I recently broke up from my relationship of 2 years. The most difficult part of it was the distance aside from a few minor bumps and bruises. It got to the point where she was no longer patient and I know we both have things to mature and grow from. I agree with the difficult choice that you have, however I see that as cheating. You have already cheated on your boyfriend by emotionally attaching to someone. That alone for most relationships does irreperable damage. Have you talked to your current boyfriend of how you truely feel and that you have been talking to another guy? As much as this hurts coming from a breakup its better to know the reasons in which the person is breaking up. I do hope you speak and communicate clearly with your significant other. My girlfriend was unhappy with the direction of our relationship. She no longer wanted to be a part of my life, I agreed with her because I wanted the best for her. I want her to be happy. I regret saying a few choice words, that for one I mutually agreed to the break up. I feel in the end its better to come clean with the guy you are with now, as I can understand looking down from the other side of the fence. I wish the best for her and I know the areas that I need to change. I have to heal and with time I will be the perfect person maybe not with her but for someone else. These thoughts still hurt as this wounds are still fresh. Please talk to him you at least owe him that much before you break up.