Choosing Between Friends & Mom ... OUCH

Dear Dee:
I have two friends. One is leaving for college and the other is going to boarding school for a year. As a Sweet 16 present, I got three tickets to a concert.

But my mom wants me to go with her. I want to go with my friends. So what should I do? I don't want to hurt my mom's feelings, but this is one of my last choices to see my two friends.

Ouch! This is a toughie. But the thing is, your mom will totally understand. She really will. And while she may act hurt a little, it's only because she'll be realizing that you're growing up and she's not the center of your universe anymore. It's true.

Now, how you handle this is of the highest importance. There are about a dozen WRONG ways, and only one RIGHT way -- so listen up. Sit down with mom, be honest and let her know how your friends' leaving is affecting you - that you feel you don't have enough time to spend with them and how you really want to make your last few days/weeks with them fun and memorable. Ask her if there's any way she'd consider letting you take your two friends to the concert. Let her know you understand she wanted to go with you, but you were hoping the two of you could work out something else to do together, maybe dinner before the show or even another fun event (movie opening, etc.).

Your attitude when talking to her is really important here. If you want her to consider you old enough to go to an event like this without adult supervision, then you have to show her you can talk to her about this like an adult. No pouting, no stomping, no yelling. You can do it. Good luck to you and have a great time at the concert!