Trying Not to Follow the Pack

Dear Dee:
I have a lot of friends who get high. I tell them to stop and that it's a stupid thing to do. They ask me if I have ever done it and when I tell them I haven't, they tell me I should. I'm really scared and I don't know what to do. Please help me.

Your solution is simple on paper, but could be a difficult one for you to enact.
I am sorry to say, you've got to stop hanging out with people who do this to themselves and insist on putting pressure on you to drug up as well. It is the only way to stay drug-free and on the path to make something fantastic of yourself.

You've admitted to being scared and I'd imagine your fear is twofold: You're scared for the friends you care about and how drug use affects them. And you're also scared for yourself and the fact that it's more and more difficult each time they ask to say 'no.'

This type of pressure, from people you care about, is especially difficult because you trust in them as friends -- and you want to be accepted. It's the classic peer pressure situation, one that's easily solved in theory but stone-cold scary in real life.

I encourage you to stay strong. Don't give in. Do all you can to start pulling away from this group. You shouldn't have to deal with the pressure they're placing on you AND you should not have to watch your friends hurt themselves by doing drugs. It's just not healthy for you.

If you feel you can, get some people who can help your friends involved. Your friends need some serious intervention in order to get their lives back on track. You can definitely have a hand in that, but you can't handle it yourself. Find someone, a school counselor or a teacher, a parent, an adult you trust to help your friends. You can also try calling a few of our hotlines to get some advice from specialists who deal with this daily.

Stay strong and stand firm in your resistance. You can do it.