Advice-Giver Seeks Advice

Dear Dee:
Alright, before I get to my problem, I just wanted to say I love your advice page! I'm always the one of my friends giving advice, and sometimes I feel like my friends don't exactly get the advice thing. Haha. So anyway, thanks.

There's this guy. (Oh god, the kiss of death.) Anyway. I've had a crush on him since early October. We've gotten pretty close over the past few months (Not best friends, but not strangers either.)

We flirt a reasonable amount, mostly on my end (although he doesn't exactly try to stop me), and all of my friends who know I like him pretty much insist he likes me.

But, well... I don't really believe them. But I really like him. Not to be cliché, but I don't think I've ever felt this way before about a guy. It actually kind of annoys me, how I act so ... off around him. We hang out a lot together in school, and sadly, I think about him way too much.(

Oh, and one thing: he did ask me to a school dance that will be in February, but I said no on the basis that he didn't sound like he really wanted to go with me, but like he was asking because a mutual friend told him to, or something.

Yes, my friends know pretty much everything about this.)So, Dee, what I need is advice (of course; who doesn't?). Anyway, thanks!

While I understand your hesitancy to go to the dance with your crush, because you think he was forced into asking you, I think you should actually go with him! What better way to show him how absolutely irresistible you are by having an entire evening with his full attention! It might be a perfect way to make a 'friendship' turn into something more. So give it some thought, K?

It most definitely sounds like you've got it bad for this guy. And hey, don't let the fact you're feeling all of this stuff about him throw you for a loop. Put it in perspective! Most of the time, us girls get it wrong because we take a crush to the extreme -- to where we simply can't even function because the guy's consuming our thoughts. We become semi-obsessed! Don't let this happen to you.

While it's perfectly cool to think about him and to want to date him, there is nothing more pitiful to a guy than a girl who can't get it together when he's around. So while you know how you feel, you don't necessarily have to let him know how you feel -- until you're ready. Play it cool, continue the flirting, be his friend and when the time is right, you can kinda let yourself go (within reason) and show him your true feelings. Remember, you don't want to appear desperate or begging for the attention.

So just give enough attention/interest to try to get him wanting more. You sound like a really strong, smart girl. I know you can master your feelings and use them to your advantage to get this guy. And if it turns out he's not all that you thought he'd be, don't worry. There are TONS of guys out there ... in fact, checking them out is 99 percent of the fun of being a girl! WOO HOO!