Tongue-Tied & Wanting to Talk to Her

Dear Dee:
I stumbled on your website while looking for themes, anyway, I have aquestion:

There's this girl I've noticed who hangs out in the same spots I do everyday. She's from a different college which is next to my college. So, she and her friends are considered to some extent as the cool kids and my friends and I are cool, but in our own way.

You see I've had the biggest crush on her for a very long time. And I am guessing she will take well to me cause, I suppose, I'm something fresh compared to her 'mainstream, M-TV-like' friends, who babble over who's cooler: Britney or Christina?

I've seen her around for so long, I literally lock up when she's around. My heart stops, my legs tremble and I feel like a little school girl.

I never really had problems talking to girls, but, there's something about her. I've noticed when her friends are in deep discussion over what the latest trend is, she seems really bored. So, maybe she'll take a shine to me.

How can I build up enough courage to talk to her, and still come off as who I am naturally and not a rambling idiot? I spoke to her once and managed to ask for a lighter before choking on my cigarette. I then promptly stumbled away spitting curses under my tongue.

So, I know you didn't ask, but I am gonna say it anyway ... STOP SMOKING! What the heck. It's not cool, makes you breath stink, teeth turn yellow and clothes smell really, really bad. Not to mention the health issues. So knock it off!

OK. I feel better now. Onto your girl dilemma: There's obviously something special about this girl if she makes you react this way -- even when you don't really know her. So you most definitely have to put yourself out there and take a chance.

How do you muster up the courage? You don't think about it and just do it. Talk to her. Ask her to go out for coffee or study or whatever (don't ask for a lighter, because, well, you're quitting ... right?). The longer you wait, the harder it'll get. So seriously -- step up to the plate and make it happen.

Don't worry about whether you fit into her crowd. You already said you think she digs you -- and if she's as special as you think she is, then what her friends think won't matter. So take advantage of your common hang outs and arrange a 'chance' meeting. Play it cool, be yourself and see what happens.

And by the way ... who's better: Britney or Christina? I have to admit I really love Britney's new song, 'Piece of Me' but ... I'd have to go with Christina (at least until she shows off her ass while getting out of a limo).